The Trans Reality: Not All Feel Good Fluff.

The other day, someone posted a story from CNN, about a documentary called “Raising Ryland“, about a family who is raising a young transgender boy.

As someone who is transgender, I have a hard time actually commenting on other people talking about “us” – I know what it was like to grow up a girl who was called/considered a boy… and I actually might have some different perspectives, sometimes I just get annoyed… not sure exactly why, though, everyone needs to be talking about this stuff, it just feels like a lot doesn’t actually include trans people and their experiences…

The reality is, that we don’t live charmed lives, we’re not fluff pieces, we’re the tragedy, and this increased visibility is going to make things worse for trans adults, before it gets better, and we have targets on our backs…

I think the thing that annoys me is parents who accept who their children are, as trans, are not heroes; they are doing exactly what they should be as parents. This isn’t extraordinary, its the bare minimum I would expect from a good parent, yet we somehow hail them as heroes. Maybe this is just my perspective as both a parent, and as a trans person, but this putting parents who somehow do what their jobs are as parents up on a pedestal annoys the hell out of me.

It makes me feel like somehow raising a trans kid and loving them is somehow harder or that we’re deserving of less love, and that parents who love us are extraordinary. However, in my opinion, they are not. This is not news.  Parents who react well to their trans child is not news. They are doing what they should be doing. Its not “above and beyond”, any more than raising any child is “above and beyond”. You make a decision to have a child, you also are committing to a lifetime of love, whether trans, gay, lesbian (sometimes combinations of), autistic, physically disabled, or whatever their difference might be.

Its frustrating to me that these things aren’t just *expected*.

I just feel like the media treats us as a circus.

“Take a look – there’s a Trans person – isn’t that cute?”

I mean I guess it’s better than “look – it’s a trans person – aren’t they a freak?”. That’s what it used to be. The closest thing to a realistic media portrayal has been Boys Don’t Cry – and to be honest that was traumatic to watch. Otherwise even these shows that are supposedly trans-forward are still not completely getting it right. It’s a spectacle, the centerpiece is “trans”. We’re normal people, not some side show. Even most of it concentrates on either how bad a person “passes” or how well they do, how beautiful they are.  It’s not about that. It’s about just being us, no matter who that may be. There are lesbian trans women , gay trans men,  butch trans women, femme trans men. There are those who ID as a third gender, no gender, or some combination of genders – gender is a spectrum – like neurological/brain wiring (like autism) is a spectrum. It’s a reverse bell curve – some lie along the curve in different places – but ultimately it’s just about accepting us as people – not as some curiosity.

And every day, even in NYC, one of the most progressive cities in the world, we are discriminated against.  Our kids, our livelihoods, our families stripped from us. Afraid to wonder when I am going to be the next statistic, walking through the world like I own it,  because it’s better than the alternative: running scared. The amount of us beaten, raped, and murdered is too high to comprehend, so we put it out of our minds, and try and live the best we can.

That is the Trans Experience – the reality of it – not fluff pieces and “isn’t that cute” or “isn’t that amazing”. I want a better world , but I am pretty sure that I may not see it in my lifetime.  I’ve been an activist for a long time and I know the reality is it will be at least 2 generations before we’re considered “people” in the eyes of most.

I usually don’t express this stuff to be honest, for the reason above, it’s better to put it out of your head because the reality is too hard to swallow sometimes.  It seems all the fluff pieces lately have gotten to me – I keep wanting to scream “this is not what it’s about!” – I keep thinking that “parents don’t deserve a medal for loving their trans kid” – because it gives an excuse for  people being bad parents. They make it seem somehow extraordinary to love a trans child. These days – look at how we react to parents who don’t love their gay kids – we call them “bad parents”. However, if a parent loves their gay kid, it’s somewhat normal, we’re not breaking a parade out unless they do something extraordinary or above and beyond (Like any other parent). So why are we ready to reward parents with media attention just because they love their trans child enough to trust their feelings about who they are?

I just feel like its hard to talk about this stuff without a few trans voices in the mix, some of whom may disagree with me… but until we have trans voices talking about trans rights, in major media (and not just the attractive ones), I don’t think it will advance beyond this. The problem is, as trans people, we are angry, rightfully so… but nobody wants to hear the anger, they want to think of themselves as doing something, or being allies.  Laws that protect us are completely unenforced. As parents, we are treated as defective, simply because we are trans or gender variant. As employees, we’re seen as “disruptive” simply for being who we are. Our lives are worth less when someone murders us, people citing “trans panic” in defense of hate crimes. In society, people look at us as some kind of side show (I mean just the use of the word “transgenders” – ugh, its not a noun, I am not “a transgender”, I am a transgender woman… it is an adjective) …. it destroys our identity in so many ways, while pretending to be allies.

When we are treated with the same human rights as everyone else, maybe this won’t be the reality. For now it is, and this is thw world we live in, and no amount of fluff, positivity in the same of being “enlightened” is going to change that until everyone sees us as equal and human, not curiosity.



Filed under Uncategorized

Don’t you think it’s time?

My experience with police has been both good and bad. I have had the experience of having close friends, gaming buddies, and such be police officers. I used to work with police, granted as a developer, developing programs to help police do their jobs better. I, up until a few years ago, trusted that police would always try and do the right thing.

That perception changed overnight. In February 2010, my 7 year old son, who, like me, is autistic (please don’t ask me about high or low functioning, as with all people, both of us are high functioning in some respects, low functioning in others), had an issue at school. I was at work, but wasn’t called (I have some theories as to why, as I was on the school advisory board, and was at direct political odds with the Principal over special education treatment and budget), they instead called my partner, who was a schoolteacher. She was also closer anyway, and headed to the school. When she got there, she was told “The ambulance already left”, and had to borrow money for a cab over to the local children’s hospital, where he was calm, collected, and told us his side of the story.

Now what actually happened in school, may have not been the issue, though it was clear that the school did not follow his IEP. He ended up melting down, but he was cognizant enough to do all the things we taught him to do – like sitting on the ground and asking them not to touch him until he calmed down (also in his IEP). Since they didn’t listen to that, and the school safety officer insisted on touching him, he got more upset and went looking for a friend of his, who was older, who was in 7th grade. A daughter of a good friend of the family’s. Ultimately, he hid behind a desk in a closet.

Due to school policies, the school called 911 (for a kid sitting behind a desk crying, scared). The police came in, manhandled him (I still have pictures of the bruises on his face and his back in the shape of a huge hand), dragged him from behind the desk, handcuffed him, when he said it was too tight (he’s autistic, at the time with major sensory issues, any touch could be painful if he wasn’t in the right state of mind), the police thought it would be appropriate to make the handcuffs tighter.

When they got to the hospital, the doctor/psychiatrist remarked that my son felt more comfortable in the hospital, than he did at school. Pointing to some major mishandling by both the school, and NYPD.

That was my son’s nightmare – it continued. So did mine.

I’m an activist. Not only am I an activist, but much of my activism has been in child rights. As a survivor of the “Troubled Teen Industry” (, I was pretty keenly aware on laws and rules regarding ethical treatment of children, as well as special education law. This was my bailiwick. I called on as many people and organizations as I could. The NYCLU (who was very helpful in setting me up with a good lawyer), my own organization – CAFETY (Community Alliance for the Ethical Treatment of Youth), and called upon every contact I had within state and local governments to look at this issue.

My son was traumatized, so I embarked on a 2 month long effort to get him in-home instruction. I talked to the public advocate, my local congressperson, my state assemblyman, my state senator. I even got appointed by the Bronx borough president to the local community board. All agreed that it was ridiculous, but at the end of the day, political pressure was not going to fix the issue.

Meanwhile, I watched my son, whom I had told all his life, to go to Police if he was lost or in danger, lose his faith in that safety. Every time we passed a policeman on the street he would try and hide. He had nightmares, he missed his friends from school, he didn’t want to talk about what happened.

I lost my faith in police to safeguard us.

I was fighting tooth and nail for justice for him. Of course, I was unaware that 3000 children in NYC per year, had had the same thing happen to them. Children, treated like prisoners, less than. The school even had the gall to say that the reason they called is because “he threatened to jump out a window on the third floor”, to which when I asked my son, he said “Why would I do that? I would get hurt or die”.

It strikes me that victim blaming is so pervasive in our world, that it is the primary way of people putting the “CYA” practice into effect. Especially in terms of people in power. Ultimately, my obsession with justice for my son, actually tore my family apart (the biggest thing I was told was that I should have never “provoked” the Principal – but what kind of person retaliates against a child for their parent’s beliefs). How many other families experienced this? I don’t know, but 3000 per year to experience the same treatment, it had to have been unimaginably stressful for those families.

Yesterday, my best friend brought this to my attention – – NYC DoE settled with 11 families for 300,000 dollars (seriously, for all the pain that they went through, that’s nothing), and is now barred from calling 911 for school discipline problems (that is huge). When I heard the news, I went through so many different emotions. The first was a sense of closure, like a literal weight had been lifted off my chest. Like a battle had been won. I wasn’t the commanding officer in the battle, but 4 years of work lay behind me – even though everything I fought for was in rubble. It felt like a pyrrhic victory. 4 years ago, I was happily partnered, my son had a pretty nuclear, if unconventional, family. Now it was a war zone, with all the damage that war causes. The next feeling I had was that of grief. Grief I could not express because there was work to do, and it needed to stop.

But it’s not over. This is all part of a systemic issue. One in which it seems those in power are not trained to think empathetically. Sure, I had issues with the principal, but the police should have responded in a much more effective manner. When I was a kid, and had similar issues, police were calm, came down and talked to me on my level, helped me figure out a better solution. They were empathic, and mindful of how I felt. They didn’t react by pulling guns on me, slapping handcuffs on me, or beating me up. I did nothing against the law. I was a child, and had a child’s reactions.

Today, we see a lot about police in the news, we read the testimony of Darren Wilson in a trial, where he actually thought he was being rushed by a two-ton Hulked out kid (Get the Gamma Guns out!), and fired off at least 9 shots at a young man in Ferguson, MO. If police were taught to slow down a little and think, more snap judgements might be correct. If police were trained to actually slow the mind down and think about solutions other than violence and show of power, then maybe Eric Garner might still be alive. Maybe all the adults who have disabilities, such as autism, who have been killed by cops, simply because they didn’t know how to or couldn’t respond, might still be alive.

No, the work is not over. It’s a cancer. It’s systemic. My personal nightmare might be resolved, even though I’ll live with the trauma done to our family for the rest of my life, but what about those who lose children to police violence? Those permanently crippled by police violence.

I’m not claiming police are bad people, but I’m a solutions person. I am a professional troubleshooter, so when I see a problem, I look for ways to solve it. The first step is identifying the real problem. The second? Identifying solutions (Then you have to put them into effect and practice them). Recently, another article was posted on Good Men Project ( about Emotional Intelligence and Police. Since that incident happened, I always wondered… if police had reacted with empathy, instead of procedural training (which was in my opinion, horrible procedure, and just asking for incident), encouraged to look for solutions outside the box to defuse a situation, what would the outcome look like?

I want to leave people with a little thought – written in Police Chief Magazine, on Mindfulness training and Police.

“Mindfulness training promises to nurture the body, mind, and spirit of our police warriors. Research has shown that mindfulness enhances emotion regulation, empathy, cognitive performance, and working memory.7 These are the ingredients for an effective police encounter and a battle-ready, empathic police officer.”

Battle-ready and empathic. Think of all the lives this may change if put into effect. I certainly would be in a very different spot, and so would my son, the 3000 kids per year this happens to in schools, and very different outcomes in many high profile police violence deaths over the past 20 years.

Don’t you think it’s time for change?

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Confessions of a Recovered Misandrist (as submitted to GMP)

I need to preface this article a little bit, I am a 40 year old intersex trans woman. I was assigned the male gender at birth, realized later I identified as female (as early as 4, but acted on transition at age 22), and even later, I was diagnosed with a medical condition called “mosaicism” , which is considered medically “Klinefelter’s Syndrome”. This means a portion of my cells are constructed with a chromosomal structure of 47(XXY) instead of 46(XY) – male, or 46(XX) – female.

When I was 18, I was put in a place that was going to “cure” me, through extremely violent brainwashing means. I was raped (the people who were the instruments of that were just as much victims as I was, but more on that later), starved, beaten, humiliated, and deprived of sleep. Later on these experiences coalesced into a rather angry young woman, who embraced 2nd wave feminist ideals with all my heart, including misandry.

My own journey was painful, and in many ways, I think productive, it brought me to a view of the world, ultimately, which saw all forms of injustice as anathema to me. However, I think that it took journeys through being a part of injustice that caused me to see things in a very different light.

For me, it was almost knee jerk. Many of the people involved in my abuse were male, from the time I was a child, up through my 20’s, I survived some rather horrific abuse. I don’t say this because I want anyone to feel sorry for me. It’s my story, and ultimately, my responsibility to recover from it. I hope that the lessons hard-won for me, will help others in the future.

In my mid-20’s I moved to a place in this country that probably has the highest per-capita rate of lesbians in the country. I settled down into my lesbian life, and was directly influenced by a lot of 2nd wave feminists. As a trans woman, I wasn’t immediately accepted, but I never pretended to be something I was not. A woman who was assigned female gender ID at birth. I simply was not, but my experiences in many mays mirrored theirs, and I was respected for being “real” – in fact I did not present overly femme, and actually preferred butch presentation, with just enough gender cues that I would not be consistently misgendered.

Misandry became a part of my being. It really did, deeply ingrained. Even as recently as 4 years ago, I visited some of my ex-girlfriend’s friends with her, and we all stayed in the same hotel room. Even though her friend, (whom I will refer to as John, a pseudonym) was extremely respectful, very unassuming, and extremely intelligent and ethical, when I was asleep and he was up and around, my ex-girlfriend said I was very jumpy, even reacting in my sleep. It might be said though that “John” was the gateway to realizing the very things that make up my own beliefs about feminism today. As I got to know him, I realized in many ways, this man was even more of a true feminist than I was.

I was a Misandrist, and while many 2nd wavers I knew (and loved) kept telling me that misandry couldn’t exist, because women were the ones who were oppressed, it started to become extremely clear: Everyone, including men, are harmed by inequality. This man, who has become one of my very dear friends, is not what society could consider masculine – he was of slight build, quiet with people he doesn’t know well, wasn’t very “handy”, certainly not athletic. However, I had come to see, this was the most “manly” man that I knew. He took responsibility for his own actions, he acted out of love, while still acknowledging anger towards injustice, he cared deeply for his friends, and did not like drama. He was, in many ways, the epitomy of the target of toxic masculinization, yet he never gave in to those social pressures. He was who he was, no bones about it.

That was the door. Over the past few years, I have seen a childhood friend (who is male) who is a sexual abuse survivor make huge strides in communicating to the world that men are victims (and survivors) of sexual violence as well, seeing the underpinnings of patriarchy that ultimately lead to that idea of “toxic masculinity”, the expectation that men should live up to certain ideals, which are impossible, as human beings are emotional people, and their physical reality is diverse, and ignoring that for half of the people on the earth is dangerous. It leads to attitudes where women raping men is seen as “lucky” – yet the same violence perpetrated against women is “heinous”. I have news for the world, it is all horrific and damaging. The realization that by “hating men”, that I played a part in injustice, was a hard pill to swallow. Gender inequality creates a situation in which nobody wins.

And that realization, has made me a stronger, and deeper feminist, and given me an appreciation for the idea of equality for all humans.

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

I give less than two f*cks about your asterisks!

I am offended. I am offended that somehow, our history got lost and the women who were techheads and trans, who were also putting themselves out there, trying to include people of all gender variance, and used a * at the end of “trans” to signify inclusion, are somehow now being told how to identify or what to do. That they are being offensive to other trans people, that they somehow are “offensive to themselves” and traitors to the cause…

That cis-allies are called “cishetscum” when they use the term as allies thinking – because other trans people told them so, that it was correct.

I am even more offended that we’re even arguing about it.

What the f*ck people…. seriously?

People are out there being killed, beaten, losing jobs, not being hired, and losing their kids because of their gender variance.

I have been beaten, raped, brainwashed, and then later lost jobs and lost my kid, because of gender variance…

And we’re arguing about an asterisk? Its gotten to the point one side is so nasty about it that its dividing the community even more than some damn asterisk ever could?

So I am offended, yes, and I couldn’t give two f*cks about your asterisk.

(maybe you all arguing against it should learn a little history of your community, we like to go on about stonewall, but the generation between did some AMAZING things to build the internet you’re bullying them over now…)

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Today’s Obligatory Blog Post: Brought to you by Misandry, Misogyny, and Toxic Party People.

I am trying to post at least one blog post a day, partially to keep up with it, because I am notorious for starting things, and then getting distracted, and then I’ll go months not posting anything, and then find a blog I started 4 years ago, that I didn’t keep up with, as I am starting a new one (yes, that happened, evidently I had a BDSM community blog back when I was partnered.)   I am finding writing quite cathartic actually.

I caught a bit of flack from a friend about the article I wrote in response to Kevin Williamson, not based on its content, but based on the fact I let The Good Men Project reprint it.

Now to be honest, it was my best friend from childhood that recommended I write it, he is the Executive Director of MaleSurvivor and someone I admire very much. A survivor of rape/sexual abuse himself (as am I), he has turned his heartache and pain into a positive and is helping others. He is an ally and a hero in every sense of the word, and I try to be an ally to him.

I was personally upset to see generally, when we discuss the Misogyny in the world, we don’t discuss the Toxic Masculinity that causes more damage to Male Survivors especially, but men in general. Toxic Masculinity and Misogyny in my mind go hand in hand. So when I looked at TGMP’s site, saw them not only addressing some trans* issues, but also Toxic Masculinity and Misogyny, I was on board.

I mentioned this to said friend, who pointed out this piece at Feministe, which essentially said that TGMP were MRA allies… because they posted something written by a self-confessed rapist.

I read the article again, and having been part of party culture in the past, I got a completely different message. They weren’t lending an excuse for this person’s screw up (though he definitely was, while simultaneously taking responsibility? I am so confused by that in and of itself), but pointing out that when drugs and alcohol get involved, things can get fucked up. Period. If you don’t know how to be responsible with your drugs, you probably shouldn’t be doing them.

For people who want the drug and are willing to sacrifice their moral compass for them, there is no absolution “because you were drunk, or high”. I wouldn’t go all out to say all drug users are fucked up. I know better than that, and know many people who can indeed be responsible.

I think personally, they pointed out something very fucked up. The fact that there are actually people who think of themselves and try to be good people, where because of another issue, severely fuck up. This doesn’t absolve them, but it does point out that this man, who obviously has some strong feelings about rape, seems to throw that out the window when it comes to drugs (and men aren’t the only offenders here). I just see the idea of “drugs are more important than my morals, and if I have to become a rapist for drugs, then so be it” to be REALLY fucked up, and I am glad they called attention to it.

By the same token, I can see where people would be upset at anyone giving an outlet to these words. It’s easy for feelings to run high, especially among people like me, self-confessed misandrists (but I am trying to change that, I really am, and my best friend would probably think I have made some extreme strides in this over the past few years) who are willing to be angry at every perceived slight in regards to misogyny, even misunderstood, just because I disagree with an aspect of what they might be saying.

But I do think, in a world where I have stopped socializing at parties friends are at because of behavior like mentioned in the article, after I spent more time policing the venues than having fun, so things like this didn’t happen, maybe it *is* something we need to talk about. Toxic attitudes take all shapes and forms, and not talking about another attitude that leads to more victims is at the least wishful thinking, at best, just as bad as people who refuse to see the misogyny inherent in the system.

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Is “Policy” an excuse for Negligence?

The last few days, we’ve been hearing about a raid in GA, US that happened where a baby got hurt by a flashbang grenade.
I have a few friends in the military who have been appalled by the fact this even happened to begin with, that police here in the United States have justified the War on Drugs so much that they aren’t even responsible to the same rules of engagement soldiers are.

In a world where governments regularly place surveillance on people that they don’t even suspect of actual wrongdoing, can you tell me that this SWAT/SRT team could not get intelligence letting them know there was a child present? That they went through the trouble to get a “no-knock” warrant, but couldn’t get a surveillance warrant to make sure that the person and items they were looking for were even on the premises?

Special Skills If a person engages in an activity requiring special skills, education, training, or experience, such as piloting an airplane, the standard by which his conduct is measured is the conduct of a reasonably skilled, competent, and experienced person who is a qualified member of the group authorized to engage in that activity. In other words, the hypothetical reasonable person is a skilled, competent, and experienced person who engages in the same activity. Often persons practicing these special skills must be licensed, such as physicians, lawyers, architects, barbers, pilots, and drivers. Anyone who performs these special skills, whether qualified or not, is held to the standards of conduct of those properly qualified to do so, because the public relies on the special expertise of those who engage in such activities. Thus, an unlicensed driver who takes his friends for a joyride is held to the standard of conduct of an experienced, licensed driver.”

I posit, since the activity is the same as the military, and requires training as such, that police forces should be held to the reasonable responsibility of getting an up to date situation report (sit-rep)

Just because policy allows something doesn’t mean its legal, or even rules out criminal negligence.

And that this Police Chief should not recognize that at all, and blame his negligence on the person who the warrant was for, is preposterous.  The buck should stop at the Police Chief or Mayor who enacted these policies, because clearly, military style force with no restraint against our citizens is precisely one of those issues that the US was founded over.

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Societal Construct or “Biological Fact”?

Mr. Williamson, I just read your article claiming that Laverne Cox cannot be a woman based on “biological fact”, yet your understanding of biological fact is somewhat outdated, or even completely wrong.

The Myth of Binary Biological Sex


Human beings do not have only two possible biological sexes, in fact, like most traits, these things lie across a continuum or spectrum. Much has been done in the fields of genetics and epigenetics to prove that it’s not “all in our heads”  – I personally spent years thinking I was some run-of-the-mill trans woman, with all that went along, until I was almost 40, and some health problems cropped up, and I was tested and found to be XXY (Klinefelter’s syndrome). Some ex-sex partners also agree my phenotype isn’t quite male, but it’s not quite female either. It’s just closer to male than female, so it was labeled as such.
I am not claiming Laverne Cox is intersex, but I am deconstructing and refuting your idea that only two sexes are available to humanity. That your so-called “biological fact” is quite outdated regarding genetics and phenotype.

You would be surprised at how many people are born with a different sex or sex chromosome difference. Leaving aside the question of “trans”  for a second (which we’ll come back to, I promise) … let’s just examine your complete misunderstanding of the facts here.

The Intersex Society of North America has a great section on how common IS conditions are:

Not XX and not XY one in 1,666 births
Klinefelter (XXY) one in 1,000 births
Androgen insensitivity syndrome one in 13,000 births
Partial androgen insensitivity syndrome one in 130,000 births
Classical congenital adrenal hyperplasia one in 13,000 births
Late onset adrenal hyperplasia one in 66 individuals
Vaginal agenesis one in 6,000 births
Ovotestes one in 83,000 births
Idiopathic (no discernable medical cause) one in 110,000 births
Iatrogenic (caused by medical treatment, for instance progestin administered to pregnant mother) no estimate
5 alpha reductase deficiency no estimate
Mixed gonadal dysgenesis no estimate
Complete gonadal dysgenesis one in 150,000 births
Hypospadias (urethral opening in perineum or along penile shaft) one in 2,000 births
Hypospadias (urethral opening between corona and tip of glans penis) one in 770 births
Total number of people whose bodies differ from standard male or female one in 100 births
Total number of people receiving surgery to “normalize” genital appearance one or two in 1,000 births

This clearly shows that intersex conditions are not as rare as one thinks. Therefore, your “human beings fall into man/woman categories based on physical sex”  argument is quite outdated. In fact, it’s a societal construct much like the one you are arguing that gives trans people the ability to identify as a different gender than assigned at birth is.

What makes your construct any more “right”  than ours is?

The History of Alternate Gender and Cross-Sex identities

In Egypt, there were three genders, though modern society claims they were castrati or eunuchs, there was very little evidence to actually suggest they were castrated.

In Vedic (South Asia) cultures, there were also three genders, and they even suggested that the third gender was made up of both male and female bodied individuals

In the US itself, there are many stories within Native American cultures that talk of “two-spirited”  individuals.

Worldwide, Western Judeo-Christian Culture has erased the cultural norms of other cultures, my own ancestors, both Irish and Italian/Roman had different views of gender and sexuality. The Celts had a very amorphous view of such, and the Romans had the Gallí – priests of the Goddess Cybele, who were male bodied but female identified. Interestingly enough, its theorized that the word Gallí came from the Celtic tribes in Galatia, now part of modern France.

Essentially, the idea of people who are transgender, and take on traditional female or male roles is ancient.

Even in modern times, Albanian female bodied people (sworn virgins) who take on traditional male roles as head of household exist, and become socially “male”. These cultures are traditionally so patriarchal, yet they allow such.

So how is my, and Laverne Cox’s experience of this gender identity expression any different from those throughout time who expressed themselves and identified as a gender opposite to the sex assigned at birth? Other than we have more understanding of the body and brain than we did in ancient times, and it lends a little more medical fact to those identifying as another gender, there is not much change in the reality of how we may see or interact with our own bodies as being different. Its not about you, Mr. Williamson. Its about me. My experience, my reality, my body. How does it hurt for you to humor me, even if you don’t agree and your worldview is based upon a Judeo-Christian one that has erased the allowances for non-binary genders and sexes. Even when there was no medical proof, these societies made allowances for such.

Our Rights within our society, or “Why does this bother you so much”?


So now that I’ve beaten your societal construct into submission, as you tried to beat ours into submission with no actual facts whatsoever. I want to bring you back to 1851 – Slavery was still quite common in the US. Black women, especially slaves were not afforded the same rights as white women (who were definitely not given the same rights as men… sound familiar?)

A woman named Sojourner Truth, a black woman from New York State, born into slavery, spoke at a woman’s convention in Ohio.

She said, “You need not be afraid to give us our rights for fear we will take too much, – for we can’t take more than our pint’ll hold. The poor men seems to be all in confusion, and don’t know what to do. Why children, if you have woman’s rights, give it to her and you will feel better. You will have your own rights, and they won’t be so much trouble.”

Does the idea of trans people being treated as equals really offend you that much? That you have to claim your world view as truth to keep people from being protected as human beings? All we want is the freedom that our little pint holds. As a white cis-gender male, you have your quart of privilege. You can have it, I don’t see why you see this so-called “societal construct” that you call attention to as such a threat to yourself. However combatting a societal construct with another, calling it “biological fact” is quite a stretch, especially since your “biological fact” is anything but fact.

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized